Awkward

That is the best way to explain most of today. I wake up much later than I planned like 10 am. But that’s okay since I can’t go to any more talks, I only have the summits and tutorial pass. Instead I embark on an epic journey to find me hand scrubs and a hair brush. The little towel I’m using just isn’t cutting it. It takes me 1 hour and 2 Walgreen to find what I’m looking for. Most people might have stopped at 5 minutes, but not me!

Around 12 pm I’m rushing off to meet a new friend, Jay. I take him to my favorite restaurant, Mo’s Grill. This small cleverly hidden burger joint has some of the best garlic fries and large grilled to your order burgers. Jay and I have a very enlightening conversation about the pit falls of Sci-Fi writing and falling to in love with words. When our huge burgers finally come, I embarrassingly have to ask Jay to cut my burger in half so I can eat it. I should note that my right hand is badly hurt and I can’t hold a whole lot of stuff, this is also another story I will tell you at the end of GDC.

After lunch I hit the Expo floor scoping out the companies hiring and the massive amount of people crammed into the hall. I do some quick swag hunting, then take off back to my room to get my resumes. It is time to talk to companies. And…

THINGS GO WRONG!

I am suddenly nervous which if you really know me, and you kind of should by now, that is a bit unusual. I become the creepy person standing in a corner clutching my folder of resumes and staring wide-eyed at the lines and recruiter. Finally I take the plunge and go to the first booth. Oh man! Everything that could go wrong did go wrong.

I didn’t even introduce myself. I just slide up and went “Do you have a writers position? I want to be a narrative designer.” When the lady said no I said my thanks and ran. But it didn’t stop there, oh no. I should have, but my stubborn side was like “No, we must do it again. We can’t leave the kind of impression.” Yeah. Like the woman really cared, but stubborn me is not listening.

So I go back, to the same lady. I stand right in line, she sees me and gives me that “What the hell are you doing back,” look over a guy’s shoulder. I should have left then too, or gone to one of the other three people. Nope, stubborn me wanted her.

I step back up and say, “Okay, let’s try this again. I’m Rebeca.” insert awkward hand shake, “And I really like what you guys are doing, I would like to leave my resume just in cause you have an opening.” She says, “Okay, I’ll give it to our recruiter.” Which I think is code for trashcan. I say my thanks and leave again.

But wait there is more!

I go to the table area to try an collect myself from that god awful ordeal, I pull out my phone to text one of my friends about the whole thing. Only to find out I don’t have my phone. Nope, I left it with the recruiter. I had to go all the way back for that. I not only have 1 walk of shame! But 3 walks of shame!

But I didn’t let that stop me. After running into another friend of mine looking for a job too. We decide to team up and double team every recruiter after that. We only hit up 3 more companies, but I handed out 2 of my resumes. Most companies want me to apply online.

Once we call it quits for a bit, we unwind over a cup of tea outside the business center. I, of course, see more people I know and invite them to join our unwinding session before the Awards Show. I’m not going to go into the whole award show bit, but I can tell you that Journey created by thatgamecompany pretty much won every award under the sun.

I don’t make it to any parties tonight, instead I just head to the view lounge and have a quite dinner by myself tucked away in a dark corner of the lounge. Eventually the writers start to trickle in and I join Tom and his small party, two people from Riot Games. When Tom and I are left alone, he and I have a heart to heart conversation. I share with him a secret I’ve been keeping from everyone. I wrote a fanfic that had actually been well received in the community of the fandom I wrote it for. He was surprised, especially when he finds out some of the particulars of the fic. I also learn that he won’t be here tomorrow and that tonight would be the last time I see him until next GDC.

When Tom leaves, I move onto join another group. And I meet a man who was happy that I had to shake with my left hand. For whatever reason he tells me that the right hand is the one he “Wanks with,” then “Please ignore that.” I let it roll off my shoulders with grace. It’s not the first time I heard that, won’t be the last, and I have no desire to start drama over it. I just politely smile and chuck it up to him being drunk considering the 3 empty glasses and the fourth one he’s working through. When he leaves for a bit, I promptly tell the guys I’m siting with what he said, and they apologize on his behalf. “I thought it was funny,” I told them, “And I’m use to it. Besides I’m cute and he’s drunk and I probably heard wrong anyways. No big deal.”

As the night winds down, I end up on the bottom floor with the last few people unwilling to turn in just yet. As I’m telling them the story about how I hurt my hand and how it relates to my Dyslexia, a new face joins us. He waits until there is a break in our conversation before addressing me.

This conversation becomes my most What the hell! conversation of the conference!

And that includes the wanking comment. But its not sexual in anyway.

He was interested in my experience as a dyslexic. He’s working on trying to enlighten game developers to the need of the disabled and the learning challenge like me. With him, I take a brief walk down memory lane and the struggles of growing up through the school system. All the trauma, anger, and frustration bubbles up and pours out of me in a giant wave. I tell him about the kids I use to work with, and how their parents just didn’t understand. How I tried to teach them my tricks for reading and spelling. He seems impressed. When I finally stop talking and I’m just sitting there pulling myself back together, he takes that moment to impart something that makes my jaw drop.

There are fonts made just for Dyslexic. Mind Blown!

I walk back to my hostel, reeling. Do you realize the kind of difference that would have had on me? On others that didn’t know such things existed. Matt, another one of my many friends, was also stunned and was surprised when I admitted that I had a hard time with character names and reading the large chunks of dialogue some developers throw at me in game.

I end this day stunned. And lying to a guy who wants to sleep with me, “Yes sir, I do have a boyfriend. He’s jacked and could tare you in two. Have a nice night!”